They may have set up the profile on a lark and forgot about it after moving on when some other social network caught their attention.They may have started dating somebody they met on that very site and just never got around to closing their account or editing their profile to indicate that they’re no longer on the market.
Most dating sites allow you to add “Active Within $TIME” to any search string.
If the owner of the profile hasn’t logged in within two weeks, the odds are good that you’re looking at a zombie profile.
The most common subject line that women receive is a variation on “Hello”: Hey, Hi, ‘sup, Yo, how YOU doin’, etc. If you two have a mutual interest in books, put that in the subject! I’ve always had good responses from “Pirates are inherently better than Ninjas” or “Zombies are superior to Vampires”.
A pithy, “Because I’m too fabulous to settle.” A polite, “Because I’m waiting for God to bring me the right man.” A peppy, “Because there are still things I’m meant to accomplish as a single woman! And to give everything a more positive sheen in order to make ourselves feel better for the moment actually only harms us more in the long run. I’m not going to end this blog with some cheesy quote or self-help speech…and I’m not going to apologize for anything I’ve written here, either. Feel free to use the comments below to voice your own fears, share your story, agree, disagree, scream, yell, cry…whatever you need to do.
and suffered the same fate as all the others, consigned to the digital garbage bin.
You need to make a point of standing out from the crowd. If you want to keep her from automatically reaching for the delete button when your message hits her inbox, you need to grab her attention. Where the truth comes out and it’s not the slightest bit pretty, or inspirational, or even positive. It’s also a truth I have kept to myself because of its ugliness. Convinced the person telling me that HAD to be mistaken. If I choose to let in the darkness and the sadness and the REALNESS…won’t I sink in it? I think I’m starting to come to a better understanding of why…but for the moment, it’s still just shadowed and blurry truth that I’m struggling to make sense of. A few years ago I felt like I could simply walk into a room and command the attention of the men in the room. I suspect it was more an internal change than an external one, as I honestly think I physically look better now than I did ten years ago. If I don’t look for the silver lining…what is the purpose to the bad things that happen?! The truth is…I don’t know exactly why I’m still single. But something changed along the way and that’s not my experience anymore.” But the truth is…sometimes I think the reason I’m still single is because I’m inherently flawed. I’m simply going to tell you that whatever your fears are about being single, you’re not alone. And life without both joy AND sadness is a life without balance. And I think it’s high time to march all of that loneliness and self doubt and fear into the light and stop hiding it away and acting like it doesn’t exist because to admit that it DOES exist is to admit vulnerability. And to go a step further…all of my great big ugly fears about what being single at age 36 says about me.Have you ever gotten sucked into something that you were also ashamed to read? I was listlessly checking my email when I noticed a text ad that I must have seen more than 10,000 times. The worst mistake a woman can make is not seeking help.