You can think of it as a Mad Libs exercise, but for sex.
"Phone sex is an exercise in improv, self awareness, and communication," she says.
Why it works: Take your time, because the longer you have on the phone with your partner, the better phone sex will be.
You're all revved up and ready to have phone sex with your partner, and then the phone rings and all you can think of saying is, "I wanna li-li-li-lick you from your head to your toes, and I wanna move from the bed, down to the, down to the to the floor." Phone conversations are hard, particularly when you're supposed to sound sexy.."We are conditioned from an early age to experience pleasure quickly and silently, due to most of us growing up in households where masturbation required stealth and speed," Manta says.Why it works: If you're at a loss for words, simply name a body part, an action, and how it makes you feel.If that's too complicated, you can swap different parts or reactions in the phrase, "Feeling your _____ inside me makes me want to _____," Manta suggests."The easiest solution is to act like you're thoroughly enjoying yourself while you catch your thoughts," she says.
Why it works: One common way to initiate phone sex is to just ask the person on the other line what they're wearing, because it's a simple but easily recognizable sign of sexual interest, according to an operator at Peach Booth, a phone sex website.
But how often do we hear the nitty-gritty of how we can actually better understand our deepest desires and most embarrassing questions?
Bustle has enlisted Vanessa Marin, a sex therapist, to help us out with the details.
Why it works: If there's a kinky sex act that you're dying to try, but are too nervous, phone sex is the perfect time to play out those fantasies.
You can bring power play into edging, for example, and bring someone to the brink of an orgasm, then slow down or stop, Manta says.
"Initiating phone sex doesn't have to be super witty; you just need something that gets the point across," she says.